Huh?

I thought I was 'over the hump' with my cold.. I was feeling so much better when suddenly, I seem to have had a horrific relapse- enough so that I got out my home nebulizer and gave myself a treatment with Xopenex.  I'm still wheezing and coughing.  I'm wondering if I need an antibiotic ... I have slept all day nearly for long long stretches and still feel wiped out. 
I know my medical insurance has been reinstated, but I haven't been billed yet.  I need to see the doctor to have my lungs assessed.  UGH.

It's Thursday.. I've been working outside trying to do a little raking and pulling out rocks around the house before it rains. I have a couple bags of grass seed that need planted.
I think I'm done for the day. My back is fine, but I am ill. Nauseated, headache, and GI upset that gets worse every time I hit the bathroom.
Chilling...I WAS planning a chicken stir fry tonite, but I think poor Wendell is gonna have to fend for himself. He'll be fine. I'm going to go lay down.

to operate or not..

Oh, such a wonderful thing.. the arrival of glorious spring!
It's to be 64* today and sunny !!!!! Ah... I've been waiting for this weather. Spring is my very favorite season of the year. My gray mood has lifted and I feel revived.

I saw the ortho doctor this week and find that according to his Xrays I have a grade 2 spondylolisthesis.. a slipped vertebra. Well, it gives a whole new outlook on why I have back pain. I also have moderate stenosis - fusing. Hmm. The treatment, as there is no cure, for this problem is actually spinal fusion. Another choice is having it injected with cortisone every 3 months or so. Neither is a good or reasonable choice for me. I've been using the blood thinner called Plavix since stroke #1. It does do a good job and to be off for a week before getting the injections/surgery would leave me vulnerable to another stroke. Of what value would this be if I had no back pain but stroke? As the doctor explained to me, I can do well at home without the surgery, but one day it will catch up with me and it'll be a no brainer need for surgery. Lovenox can be used to thin blood at that point. Also I'm considering the fact that neither procedure is any guarantee of being pain free even for a short time.
He suggests that I continue my present regimen and use oral pain medication as I need it. I also will be resigning from my office position as it aggravates the problem and it's getting harder to recuperate.
So.... I must get a letter of resignation ready.

On a more positive note

Have you ever had someone pray over you and you actually FELT the change ? I went to bed shortly after I made my last blog note and then a note on Face Book. It is 3am. I awoke at 2am needing to be on my feet. I rolled over in bed, sat up, and became acutely aware of the fact that I didn't have the pain of last evening.. gone. I set aside the quad cane I'd been using and walked normally to the bathroom-
Who can explain these things except knowing that family and friends had been praying for my relief. I am in awe when I realize the power of prayer over one of God's children. I am blessed.
I will be making appointments to see the specialists and to have that MRI done. I can do this.

This is probably going to sound very negative, but I'm going to blog it anyway. I am taking a one month leave of absence from the office. I intend to see a rheumatologist, get an MRI of my back, and perhaps visit a pain clinic.
I dont' really want to leave the office, but I fear that's what is coming. Office days are wonderful with the patients, but when I leave and go home, I can't walk .. and when I do, I hurt. It's off the chart on the pain scale.. so, I feel this is a good thing in a way, and perhaps I will retire finally all the way. Sometimes God has to give me a BIG nudge.. and I'm feeling it.

Ugh! 1*

I know it's winter, but it's 1* this morning and the weatherman says it may get to 25* today some time.. Brrrrrrr! It's cold!
Despite medication to help me sleep through the night, this has been a very bad night for sleep. Whatever happened to cause the aching and sore muscles/joints to return yesterday? The hi protein/low carb diet seemed to be working pretty well.. and now, a relapse? One thing I am thankful for is that there is no spasm in my hips as I had before.. I'll deal with general malaise..

My heart is glad.. I woke up this morning feeling refreshed and having minimal discomfort in joints/muscles. Yesterday was likely the worst day for many months of this seige, but today is a new day. . .. so what was the difference?
1. New high protein low carb diet for 2 days
2. I took 1mg Ativan last night for sleep- haven't taken that for a year or more.
3. Prayer.. lots of it.. lots of folks remembering that I hurt and placing me at Jesus' feet.

4. combination of all of the above.. my guess is mostly #3.

I'm thankful for praying friends and family.. Today I am on my feet and walking freely.

Good news, bad news

There was good news and bad news today.. the good news is that I don't have fibromyalgia.. the bad news is that my lab results indicate that I have an immune system problem.. now to identify it. The doctor said I may have had mononucleosis at some point in the past few months.. and am healing from it and will continue to heal for the next 6 months or so.. OR I have some virus.. or infection somewhere.. OH, for evermore.
Now I need to find out what is causing my fatigue and body aches.. and inability to sit down and get up and walk without a problem..
I think a chiropractic visit might be helpful..

I am awake at 1am

Well, true to my diagnosis, I have slept 5 hours and am now awake. Something is different this early silent hour of the morning. I woke up and turned over by myself with little pain. I sense someone has been praying over me. It's a most wonderful feeling. I got out of bed since I was feeling wide awake, and took hold of my trusty quad cane waiting for me right there at the side of the bed, and made my way to the bathroom without a lot of difficulty- at least not like I have been experiencing. I feel balanced. When I realized I was not having the usual pain in my legs and back, I left the cane behind and walked the length of the trailer.
Wendell is sleeping. I know he'd be thrilled to know I am finally NOT hurting, but I won't waken him to tell him- it would be kinder to let him sleep. Instead, I'm blogging my story.
It may have been the massage of my shoulders and upper back that led to this, I don't know. I had him work on this area. I didn't know a body had so many 'pressure points' that could scream pain in such a small location, but he massaged each one and my neck too. I couldn't count the points, but I'm certain there were at least 16 or more.
I approached my rheumatology employer yesterday about the FM, and he has given me a long list of labs to be done before he will treat me. There is a drug out there that is used to treat FM- Lyrica. I checked my insurance formulary and it does cover it.
It's a brisk clear night tonite- 21* and really not any wind. Very cold outside, very cozy inside. We don't change the thermostat much, but hold it under 70*. The driveway is open for now, and the weather prognosticator says we shall have spring like weather on Thursday- 40* ! Wow! I feel like we haven't seen that kind of weather in a while.

I see that foto friday at Renaissance is back in swing. I may not get my 2 cents in this week, perhaps next week. I haven't taken many pictures since we made the big move Dec 21st. I just haven't had much time for anything but putting our house together the way we want it. It still has a way to go, but we are getting closer. I look forward to joining back in with the photography. This week's topic is ''snow''. We certainly have our share of that. I did notice that the individual snowflakes are so awesome.. not an act of randomness in them at all, but perfect geometric shapes.. I note also that some of the snow is heavy and grainy while other snow is light and fluffy.. we had that last night. It's drier and you can blow it away easily.. but it also piles up much faster than the grainy stuff.
We had major snow drifts these past 2 weeks and were snowbound for a while.. wish I'd taken some pictures of that. And then the strange footprints in the newly fallen snow would have been good too. I've pretty well agreed it was likely a large turkey passing through. Our front deck had so much snow that we couldn't get the door opened. I trudged out through the back where it came up to my knees or more with a shovel and made a path to open the door. Many good shots missed I'm afraid.

I really should head back to bed..

time for some whine...

I have a lot on my plate.. if you prefer, don't bother reading this post, as I just need to whine a bit...
I had my yearly visit with my PCP today.. and told him about all the pain I'd been having steadily for over a month.. well before we moved. It's in all my muscles and joints.. in fact, I can sit comfortably for about 5 minutes, and when I try to get up, my entire body revolts. It hurts pretty badly. I had gone in with fibromyalgia on my mind, and that's what the doctor thinks too. I have taken the 'big gun' pain meds with little to no relief most of the time. Sometimes I can actually feel better, but not often..
I enjoy sitting down to watch a movie, but when I try to get up, the pain shoots all over my body and when I do finally get on my feet, they don't cooperate.. and I am left just standing without walking. Very frustrating.
So yesterday morning I took the muscle relaxer Soma to help me through the day. It worked better than the pain killers, so I thought maybe I'd take one at bedtime. Big mistake. I felt as if my body was on overload all night, couldn't find a comfortable position no matter what, and my fussing and moaning kept Wendell awake too. Forevermore.
The doctor advises against taking this stuff at bedtime since instead of dragging me down, it does just the opposite.
Despite it all, other than last night, I have been sleeping very well. But I never move all night normally, and when I get up in the morning, I use the quad cane until I get moving better.
So I guess I have to make an appointment with my rheumatology employer and have him treat this with whatever.. Lyrica? Can't afford it.
Tomorrow is a long office day.. I'm really concerned about doing the entire day.. I don't feel strong right now.
I'll talk to my boss..

Wendell saw the endocrinologist this week. He was pleased with Wendell's labs and his progress. His A1C went from 9.something to 7.1 . Thanks Mandy for the meals that make the difference!

It's been a month since I had an asthma attack. I'm glad the time has passed and I'm doing better. I had a doctor appointment today for a checkup- she says she hears a wheeze in only one area- good sign- last time he heard air exchange in only one area! So I got a couple samples of nasal sprays to try- most of my congestion is from post nasal drip anyway. She thinks this may help the problem.. and I was also advised to use the nebulizer more often than I have been doing since the goal is control of asthma without the use of steroids. Ah.. steroids.. they cause some nasty side effects for me. I took them anyway because the inflammation had been so great.

Tonite we are having Chinese Take out.. Yay!!!!!! Love it! General Tso's chicken.. garlic chicken, chicken lo mein and rice. Yummy.

I have a suspicion that we are going to go from an extended spring right into fall. It's been a very moderate summer so far with only one day above 90. It's 68 right now and wet. Not raining, just nothing has dried out for the past few days.
We had a blistering thunder buster Tuesday evening that came out of nowhere seemingly, hit hard, caused a 7 hr power outage, and was gone in minutes. Office today was good but I was so very weary after. I wasn't sure I'd make it through. I got up today with a horrific backache which I assume is weather induced. It's still with me and makes it hard to walk by times. I finished up around 3pm and as I went to the front of the office to check out, I noticed a blinding pouring down rain... a pounding rain that made 6" rivers in the parking area- it looked like the pictures on tv of hurricanes. I wondered if and/or when my car would come whooshing down past me. I'd cracked my car windows this morning and realized everything was gonna be soaked- so I made a dash for it with papers safely in plastic and keys in my hand. I was totally drenched before I got 3' from the door. UGH. Soaked through and through.. and the rain had indeed wet the inside of the car- I literally could squeeze water out of my steering wheel cover. For evermore.
I got home where it looked like we'd had some rain, but not the downpour of the city. I struggled out of the car and got inside where things were dry. I got a snack to eat and then layed down for a 1' nap.. which ended up a 4 hour nap.. and I just woke up. I had a bite of chicken that was supper tonite.. and then realized I was now chilled to the bone and still damp from earlier in the day. I'm still having a bit of trouble ambulating.. not sure which is worse, but together it's just not pleasant.
Patients did well today. Only one got more than 1 stick (((boo))).. but then when I finally did get her going, it was a dandy. One patient had her usual infusion reaction, but safely completed the infusion. I suppose the day was status quo in reality.

The new chimney here is really looking beautiful. The guys are almost done. Tomorrow should do the trick I 'm sure. It looks a lot different without chimney blocks..and now bricked.
Pictures later.. before and after. I don't have the energy to retrieve the camera and upload tonite.

It's Monday. I again slept poorly last night, but have had a better day. I was awake a lot likely from the coughing, but also because I slept most of yesterday too. I got up feeling exhausted, but Amanda wanted me to go with them to the glass blowing place north of here, and as long as I didn't have to drive or walk far, I figured I'd give it a shot. I had them stop for breakfast at McD's so I could take my steroid tablet.. and then I had my rescue MDI as well as my nebulizer with me the whole time. I was a little wheezy, but no major attacks today.
I took a nap this afternoon and I've been trying to walk around a bit too. I just feel wiped out.
Tomorrow is office day and I wonder what will happen.. Pray I'm able to do my job without respiratory distress.. and that my patients will be infused without event.
Peak flow is hanging in there at 250 today.. mid way.. caution.. it can drop like a rock if I'm not super careful. Unfortunately, it won't zoom right up if I am... go figure.
Saturday is the Imm reunion. I'm hoping to be able to go.. and then Sabbath afternoon we have been invited to a 70th birthday celebration for my cousin Ken.

Missed church today..sigh..

Despite the fact that I was up much of last night coughing and then fell asleep out of sheer exhaustion, I plan to have a decent day. I thank the Lord that things aren't any worse, and He's teaching me patience. I can't get over this in a day or two.. it takes time and it's a slow recoup.
It's really a lovely day outside.. in the 70s and a bit cloudy. I may take a walk out to see what I can find. I have to remember to move very slowly or I'll end up wheezing and coughing.
It's all part of that 'patience'.
This is definitely not what we had in mind when we retired. We were going to set the world on fire traveling around visiting our family. God has a way of showing us He doesn't want us going that direction.. at least not yet.
Perhaps pray over our health situation here. Wendell is sore and looking at surgery in the coming months. He needs help with following his diet NOW so that he'll be compliant when the time comes. I need to be able to carry a patient load on Tuesday at the office without having to stop to catch my breath.

not a happy camper

I suppose I should mention that we did not get to go to our picnic today. I'd gone to have pictures made to share with the folks there, and then this morning woke up with thrush. The doctor on call called in a script for Mycelex lozenges to treat it. I went to the pharmacy and was glad to know that my copay was all that was needed. Next on the agenda was grocery shopping for a veggie tray for the picnic. I coughed the entire way around the grocery store, and was short of breath by the time I got to the check out line. This asthma is sensitive to any kind of exercise.. I was in a hurry and thus coughed the entire time. It was embarrassing to have people staring at me like I had the 'plague'.. I wanted to scream at them "I'M NOT CONTAGIOUS!!" Fortunately I didn't have enough breath, so I just checked out as fast as possible.
I called our friend to tell her about my problem and to say that there was a good possibility that we wouldn't be there for the picnic. She was understanding. I figure there is a fellowship dinner at our church tomorrow and my cupcakes at least will get taken in for that... provided I can get myself ready for church without having a major breathing problem. I can't be sure of anything with this asthma.
I again remind myself that I always hated taking care of asthmatics and diabetics.. and to be the asthmatic now and have my hubby as the diabetic seems just so unfair..don't you think?
Neither of these kinds of patients can be trusted to be stable for any length of time. They tend to be fine one moment and either gasping or in shock the next.. just not my favorite patient assignment.
I had to lay down this afternoon and when I awoke it was supper time and raining. We decided not to try to go to the picnic.. I was wheezing and coughing pretty hard anyway.

It's Saturday. Thursday I had an asthma attack and started steroids. I now have yet another related problem. My tongue is coated in white splotches as is the back of my throat. My mouth feels like sandpaper. It started last night.. it's thrush. I will have spent the past 3 days at the pharmacy trying to get over asthma and side effects of the treatment. I have 4 more days of steroids. Of course it's Saturday and the doctor isn't in, but I may have a script on file for at least Nystatin. I spent a lot of last summer on this med. It tastes horrific, but it does work well and fast. It's a 'swish and spit'.

my nebulizer

This is a picture of my nebulizer.. my mouth piece and the medicine cup are a little different, but it gives you the idea. It's tiny and portable.. it even runs on the car battery and I was able to give myself a treatment in the KMart parking lot on my way home from the pharmacy. The treatments last about 3-5 minutes.

Road trip

It's a good day to take a road trip. That's after work today. I still have to work most of the day- 9 patients are awaiting infusions. I'll be very tired and sore when I'm done, but Wendell will do the driving to Valentines this afternoon. Pray for traveling mercy for us please.

Pray for no 'events' at the office too. The past 2 weeks we have had one event each week. Minor little things, but needing special attention nonetheless. The truth be known, in 6 years of infusions of biologics, we have had 3 actual reactions to the biologics. Everything else has been infusion reaction or just anxiety related. I can say that with authority in that the patients have all been able to finish the IV after they got settled down again. Curious.
Other kinds of problems exist, but these are related to patients who, when asked, deny any signs of infection figuring their sore throat is a minor thing, and then the molehill becomes a mountain. Biologics lower the immune system.

Gotta get a move on here.. lots to do before work and then, I have an early start today, so I need to be there a little earlier.

The bariatric surgeon's office called this evening and has accepted Wendell into their program! He will have his surgery !!Follow along with us on the DOWNSIZING blog at your right.